goal setting

One week of no social media…Can you do it?

1 week of no social media. Sounds easy enough right? I will admit that I am somewhat addicted, no not even somewhat, I AM addicted. Facebook and Instagram being the two major culprits.social media I am challenging myself to slowly decrease my time on social media to make time for other important things in life. That shit pulls you in people. And let’s be honest, is it really relevant that we check our Facebook’s every 10 minutes because we might miss something important? Come on, tell me that last important, had to die for information you got from Facebook? That your best friend’s brother’s cousin is no longer in a relationship with someone you don’t even know? The more I think about it, I’m not really sure what the last important thing I saw on Facebook that absolutely was glad I didn’t miss! Instagram is even worse for me. I’m not sure why I continue to check that damn thing every half hour only to see another shout out from another account trying to get more followers, or another picture of someone showing me what the hell they are eating, or another ego driven individual taking a half-naked selfie (which they probably took at least 10 times to get the right pose and right lighting). Don’t get me wrong, I’ve done all these things and posted these things but does anyone really care that much? Probably not. I have to ask myself, “Why does this shit intrigue me?” And honestly I cannot give you an answer as to why I continue to be drawn in by all of it. It is now just a habit I’ve formed and I’m wanting to change it. Now, social media definitely has its place. I do enjoy seeing what my family members are up to that I don’t get a chance to see often, and I also think that social media is great for businesses to network and for promotion as well, I’m just saying I have a problem and an addiction to it! I am starting with an hour a day and will slowly decrease time from there to eventually where I can find a balance:) Each week I am trying to break or change a bad habit I have and also to start a new habit, a good one. The first quest is to start limiting my time on social media each day and make room for areas in my life that I feel are much more important. I feel I’ve wasted too many hours of really nothing and now it’s time to change that! If anyone is up for the challenge with me let’s do it! I am challenging myself weekly to be better and improve different areas of my life, and I challenge everyone to do the same. If you feel like you are spending hours on social media but making excuses of why you can’t do other things in your life, let’s change it. I will update you every few days of my challenge to see how things are going:) Here is my first plan of attack and it starts today:
1-I will only check social media during my lunch and allow myself 30 minutes at night.
2-During this time is the only time I can post something on my accounts.
My goal by the end of this week is to have my social media time down to only 1 hour per day. I’m going to find other things to occupy my time and let’s see how productive I can be without as much social media in my life:)
I leave you with this article explaining why Facebook is similar to crack…And remember, this is my life, my choices, and I choose to be awesome. Always be you.
Abby
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/dr-judson-brewer/social-media-addiction_b_4079697.html

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Did I just road trip across country again?! Yep…Willie Nelson style

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5 days and 4 states later, I am at my destination of Lancaster, CA. This is my home for the next three months as I fulfill another 13 week assignment. In 5 days I drove through 4 states, saw amazing mountains, deserts, and beaches. There was a lot of IPod shuffle going on and Podcasts for days. Let me tell you, it’s amazing some of the songs I had on my IPod I was totally unaware of. Anyways, my pit stops were no name New Mexico, Tucson, and San Diego. I have been wanting to come to California for a long time now to work, however, in my profession you need a license in each state you work in and let’s just say that Cali was quite the process. But all is good now and I’m here! The opportunity that came up couldn’t have worked out any better. I was able to get a position near one of the cities I wanted to experience (Los Angeles) and am grateful and blessed to be able to stay with family friends right near my job! All things happen for a reason people, I truly am a believer in that concept. So now I yet again am able to experience the California and LA culture, but back to the purpose of this blog, the road trip.

Believe it or not, the 1500 miles it took to get here didn’t seem that long. I had beautiful scenery along the way and even got to spend  a few days with a new great friend in San Diego. I have never been even remotely west in my life besides Dallas, TX. The mountains through New Mexico as well as Arizona were breath taking. Also, driving by myself I had a lot of time to reflect and think. I thought about many things on my trip. I came to the conclusion that my life right now is the complete opposite it’s been for the past 28 years. For example, Abby a year ago: Scared, never took chances, boring, non adventurous, wanted to stay in the safe/comfort zone at all times, non social, depressed and letting each day go by without “living.” Abby today: The complete and utter opposite of each and every term I just described me as previously. I’m out to live life and jump at new opportunities, meet amazing people, and have a hell of a good time doing it. Many may ask, “why did you change so much, what happened?” It’s funny because I thought at the time, the thing that happened to me was the worst thing in the world and my life was over, turned out to be the best thing that could have ever happened. I won’t go into detail, but as I was lying on my couch for who knows how many days in a row from depression, I simply made a decision that I didn’t want that life anymore. I didn’t want to be depressed. I made a decision to get up, get going, start my life over, and never look back. Not looking back has led me to amazing new experiences, amazing new opportunities, amazing new friends, and an amazing life. Not everyday is perfect, I will be honest. However, I still believe I have an amazing life now, even if it’s not all great ALL the time. The days that aren’t great I forget about and move on to the next. Each day I get to experience is a great day in my book, good or not so good. 

Sorry about my ramble, I got a little off topic there. Back to the point of this blog, my road trip. FYI, the Prius was the best investment ever….Just saying that if you are traveling across country every few months, getting 48 mpg is a huge money saver. Anyways, the pics at the top are ones I took along the way. Some of them yes I was driving, which probably isn’t the smartest thing to do, but hell I had to get some pictures somehow! I promise I was extremely careful and I didn’t text and drive:) Good night my awesome people, and stay with me on this journey in Cali. I have a good feeling about it….As always, live awesome.

Abby

What happens in Vegas

Ahhhh Vegas….The city that never sleeps…Very true. I stayed up until 5 am the entire weekend when typical me would have been fighting to keep my eyes open at 10 o’clock. They honestly pump that place full of oxygen allowing you to stay up extra late to spend and lose money. I am by no means a “clubber” or whatever you call it, but somehow couldn’t turn down the VIP table along with free drinks all night that were offered to the girls and I. I danced my ass off for 5 hours straight with a group of 30 something wall street/investment banker men on their annual “live it up” weekend away from their girlfriends/wives. It’s true, you really can get married in like a second if you want. I wisely chose not to. The casinos were amazing, as well as the lights, people, and night life in general. As far as money goes, I think I pretty much broke even, and that was thanks to finding a $100 bill on the ground at the casino. The reason I was visiting Vegas was to attend the 2013 Mr. Olympia Expo so I didn’t check out any shows, but I’m saving that for next time. The weekend was crazy! It was unreal to see so many muscles, six pack abs, and spray tanned individuals. The expo was one of a kind, and I actually had to go buy another suitcase to put all the supplements, samples, shaker bottles, and t-shirts I received.

I did not get to experience any shows, but I will be back. I met lots of new people, and finally got to meet a few Facebook friends I have literally known for like 3 years but never met in person. The girls I met were amazing, and I now have lifelong friends. I didn’t get to go to any shows only being there a few days, but definitely next time. Trust me, there will be a next time. In case you’re wondering, yes I saw plenty of Elvis impersonators as well as other “characters.”lasvegas If you have never been to Vegas I would highly recommend at least once in your life trying to get there. I will warn you that you will need to plan a second trip because there is too much there to see and do. You possibly can’t do it all at once. So start planning YOUR Vegas vacation, and possibly a second or third….As always, live awesome!
Abby
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You don’t have to agree with my choices, but respect them.

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Don’t lie. We have all been critical of others. At some point in our lives we have criticized someone because of the way they dress, speak, look, how they live, what they eat, etc. I will admit, I’ve done it. I used to do it all the time. However, when people started to criticize me and the way I live and do things is when I said to myself, “they don’t even know me or my story”, and it was then that I decided to not be critical of others anymore. It was then I said I would get to know someone before I made an opinion about them, and even if I didn’t agree with their choices, I would respect them. We all have the right to be who we want to be in this world. Frankly, it’s none of my business how someone dresses, eats, and lives. If their choices make them happy, I respect that. Who’s to say that MY opinions are right anyways? They are my thoughts and my preferences. That is what makes life great. We all have the choices to be whoever we want to be. It’s great to be an individual. People are the way they are for a reason. We often judge others based on our own backgrounds and experiences. If you want to know something about someone, ask them. Know someone’s story before you are quick to judge them. You may be judging someone on something they cannot control.

When I did my first figure competition, oh god were people critical. “She’s on steroids, she looks like a man, she must be starving herself, she probably doesn’t eat, blah blah.” Did it bother me at first?  Yes. Does it bother me now? No. In fact, it makes me laugh. I know exactly what I did to get to that day on stage, and most of the criticisms people made were false. Regardless of what you do, you must not care what people think of you. I know this sometimes can be hard, but no matter what, there will ALWAYS, and I mean ALWAYS someone who will judge you in a negative way. You cannot please everyone in this world, and if you spend your time trying to convince that ONE negative person who criticizes you, you’re missing out on all the people who respect you. Trying to make that ONE person happy is a waste of your time. That one person will always put you down no matter what. Don’t make time for people like that in your life. Living happy means being surrounded by people who are willing to know your story and respect you and your choices. I don’t have time for people who are going to tear me down. That’s why I don’t pay attention to them. I do a lot of things in my life that people don’t understand. I have plenty of habits that others don’t. But if you are willing to ask me and get to know me, you may be surprised as to why I do the things I do. Instead of talking behind someone’s back, ask them their story. If you still don’t agree, that’s ok, still give them respect. Live as an individual and be different. If things you love are not the “norm” it’s ok. Happiness is what everyone strives for in this life,  so don’t judge someone’s happiness. That is for them to decide. As always, live awesome.

 

Abby

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Just because I’m alone, does not mean I’m lonely

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Since I started this travelling gig, I have learned to be alone. I have learned to go into unfamiliar places and to depend on no one but myself. I go into a city not knowing a single person. I have the ability to make friends and talk to people no matter where I’m at. I have the ability to put myself out there and discover new things. But sometimes, I want to just be alone. Am I depressed? Lonely? Sad? Nope..I just want to be alone! At 29 years old, I am finally starting to figure out the person I am, but I will never stop learning or discovering things about myself. Life is always a journey. For those that don’t know about me, I have been divorced over a year now. I basically took a huge leap of faith and completely changed my life. So far, it’s been the best decision I’ve ever made. Back to my point, I will put it to you this way, I actually like being alone. It doesn’t scare me and it doesn’t bother me. I honestly think that people don’t spend enough time alone, reflecting and learning to grow as a person. Now, do I think as humans we need interactions with others as well? Of course I do, but I think that there is no shame in wanting to spend time with yourself. I know it has allowed me to become a better person and truly discover what I want in life. I don’t have to be around people all the time. I can go out by myself and experience things without the need of someone else. Sorry, but I’m not missing out on something in life because I don’t have anyone to do anything with. If you truly want to live a happy life, you have to be dependent on yourself, trust yourself, and not look for the dependence or approval of others for things you want to do. Happy Sunday everyone.

Abby

Be a “DOER” dammit

The world needs dreamers and the world needs doers

 

Reaching and achieving a goal is one of the most awesome feelings in the world. Am I right? Whether it’s a weight loss goal, education goal, family goal, career goal, etc. Finally achieving something you have set your mind to and accomplished feels awesome. Many times however, there are dreams and goals we feel like are so far out of our reach. At the first sign of defeat we quit, and never fully see the potential or basically give up on our dream or goal. I’m here to tell you that if you want something bad enough, you will figure out a way to do it. No matter how long it takes. It may be something that will take years to accomplish, but at the end of the day it doesn’t matter how long it takes us to achieve a goal, what matters is that you achieve it. In order to reach a specific goal, there needs to be action that will have to take place. You ABSOLUTELY cannot achieve anything if you don’t put in the work to get shit done. There are a lot of “talkers” in this world and not enough “doers.” Let me explain.

Talkers-The people that have big, beautiful plans to do this and do that. They will tell you their brilliant ideas, and talk about them all day long. Yet you never see them putting forth any effort towards their goals. I know many people like this. I used to be one of them. In fact, I will say that I still portray some traits as a talker, but am slowly coming out of that world. You can talk all day long, but no action means no results. Everything looks good on paper.

Doers-While the talkers are wasting their time just “saying” their goals out loud and how they will achieve them, the doers are actually putting in the time, effort, and work required to succeed. The doers of the world are on top.

Tips on becoming a doer:

  1. Come up with a goal and an action plan.
    1. Write down your goal, read it daily, and visualize achieving it. Writing an action plan (which I will go over on future blog) which includes the steps necessary to achieve the long term goal.
    2. Make time to achieve your goal.
      1. Set aside time each day to progress towards the goal you want to achieve. The time spent is up to you, whether it’s 2 hours or 30 minutes, make SOME time which is better than no time.
      2. Come up with reasons of why you can instead of why you can’t.
        1. Quit making excuses or saying you don’t have time. Remember, if your goal is important, you will make time.
        2. When you fail at something, think of a different way.
          1. Doers will fail time and time again. What makes them different from talkers is that they will find a different way instead of quitting. Remember, there are a million ways to skin a cat. Maybe not a million, but you get the idea.

Let’s put this into action. One of my goals I have wanted to accomplish for a while is to learn Spanish. I won’t lie, I’ve been “talking” about learning a second language for months now. I bought a beginner course about 2 months ago and it still sits on my desk unopened. Now I’m ready to take action and learn! My action plan to achieve my goal is to set aside 20 minutes per day to study. In my future blogs I will elaborate more on the steps of becoming a doer. I could write all night on goal setting, achievement and steps for success. There is no better feeling than self-fulfillment and accomplishment. With that being said, always be a doer, and always live awesome.

 

Abby

Wasted Time…

 

So, this week I’ve been experimenting. Often times we find ourselves saying, “I’m so busy, I can’t find the time to: Workout, start a project, clean, cook healthy, call a family member, do this, do that, and the list goes on.” I, myself, find that I tend to say I don’t have the time to do certain things. I wanted to see how true this really was. Each day I marked down how many hours of wasted time I spend during the day. What do I consider wasted time? Well even though I like doing some of these things, I actually do consider them to be a waste of time knowing I could be doing something more productive. My list included:

  1. Facebook/Instagram/Social Media-Yes I know I know, but trust me, the world will not end if I can’t get on Facebook for one hour to see who’s life is miserable, who hates their job, what someone ate today, what someone looks like at the gym, or the latest post of someone I have no clue managed to get on my friends list because I have no idea who they are.
  2. Television-Yep I’m guilty. I watch the drama filled lives of others on Reality TV and live vicariously through Housewives, the Big Brother House, and others.
  3. Napping-I don’t take a nap every day, but sometimes if I get the chance and I’m in a position to do so, I will nap. However, I tend to take longer naps than I probably should.
  4. Surfing the Web-This does not count social media. There are some things I need to look up to find out information for, but I also tend to wander the web and find myself at very interesting places to say the least that really have nothing to do with me or what I was attempting to get on the internet for anyways.
  5. Sleeping-This does not included napping, this includes that extra hour or two in the morning I hit the snooze alarm 50 times when I could have just gotten my butt up out of bed and had a 2 hour start to my day. OR the hour or two I spent tossing and turning and unable to fall asleep when I could have been doing paperwork or getting something productive done.

These 5 things I thought where my biggest time wasters this week. After a week of this I figured that on average I wasted roughly 4 hours per day. When I actually looked at this on paper and realized each week I could be wasting 28-30 HOURS! Are you kidding me!?!? That’s a lot of time I could be doing things that I love, exploring new passions, getting little projects done, knocking things off my bucket list, learning a new skill, calling family, reaching my goals faster, and the list goes on. It’s incredible when you really look at all the time we “waste” during the day, but then later mention that we just don’t have the time to do certain things. Now with this being said, I’m not saying I will stop getting on Facebook nor give up my dose of Housewife drama, but I will decrease the time tremendously that I’m doing these things and set aside specified times for those certain things as well.

Be more aware of where your time is going to. Try my experiment for a week.  Write down what you feel are “time wasters” and how much time per day you spend doing these things. Take a look at the list after a week a then I bet you can’t say to yourself, “I just don’t have time to work out, I don’t have time to go back to school, I don’t have time to visit or call my family, etc.” I learned through this experiment that in fact I DO have the time to do a lot of things I say I can’t, but it’s about MAKING the time. My question to you is, do you REALLY need to get on Facebook right now for 30 minutes when you could be working out? Do you REALLY need to watch the latest episode of reality television on FOX instead of doing your school work?  I promise that when you start to FIND the time to do the things you’ve been putting off, you will feel more accomplished, you will feel a sense of freedom, and your goals will get reached MUCH faster, and life will just be much more awesome!

Abby~